I was thinking about how it seems like fear and anger lead to most sin. Anger is one of the seven deadly sins, but fear isn’t. I keep wondering about that. The concept made me think about the Buddhist idea that to achieve a sense of Zen the person must first let go of all desire and attachments. The concept is simple and yet extremely difficult at the same time.
If I can let go of all my desires and attachments, then I can be perfectly at peace. The only problem is that all my desires and attachments are just physical things. They include all my relationships with other people, my ambitions, my wants, my needs, and most importantly, my life. If I could let go of my desire for all these things, then I wouldn’t be distressed if someone took them from me. And suddenly, I understand the problem of fear. The problem isn’t so much about fear as it is about desire and attachment.
There’s a concept of faith that I have come to understand that helps me with this problem. I hold God above all else and only He has true power in my life. No personal possession, no relationship (even with my husband), no desire, nor any attachment will ever be as important as my relationship with God. This commandment is so important to me that I am willing to die for it. I believe that if everything was taken from me no matter how bad that felt or how much I would struggle with it, I would endure because the one thing that can never be taken from me is God. I have found the Zen in my life by holding God at my center. I’m not there at the time. I struggle. I am only human. However, when I try to hold God at the center, I find that I don’t need to be afraid because I can let go of everything and He will hold me up as I walk my path. Letting go like that takes a leap of faith. It’s a choice that I have to make every day and it’s a struggle I will go through every day of my life, but I have no doubt that it is worth the struggle.
My faith saved me. May God’s peace reside in all of our hearts.
