In the last week or so, I have been writing about how I felt about the mass shootings and the gun violence in our country. I have written about how the heart of our country needs to change if any real change is going to happen. Then I sit and watch the news, I listen to all the same speeches by the same politicians, and I know that nothing is going to change. Not really. I feel really hopeless and disheartened. Knowing that gun violence hasn’t really touched my life in a personal way, I can’t imagine how someone who has lost someone to gun violence must be feeling. The despair and sorrow of knowing that the plague that killed their loved one is continuing due to the inaction of our leaders must be crushing.
Yet today I remember that there’s always hope as long as there are people of faith. As long as people carry the light of God in their hearts and believe, then miracles can happen. When a miracle happens, it doesn’t start with a grand thunder bolt passing through the sky, it starts with a small change that grows into something larger. I can’t change the world, but I can change my life. When the pandemic hit and people were dying from this deadly virus, gun sales went up in this country. That says something. I’m afraid of being surrounded by people who are so fearful that when others are dying of a virus, they feel it necessary to go buy guns to defend themselves. Despite this fear, I won’t fight. I want to be that person that God know I can be. I want to be a person of peace. In my daily life, when I look at my brothers and sisters, I want to see them with eyes of compassion and love. I may not be able to change the heart of the nation, but I can change my own heart. And if I change my heart, maybe it will spread like a virus to others.
It’s an animal instinct within all of us to have that fight or flight response. I understand it. I feel it myself often. However, when Adam and Eve ate from the Tree of Knowledge, we gained an ability to rise above that instinct: to use reason, understanding, compassion, and most importantly love. I could spend my life just seeking out one pleasure after another or trying to get as much money and power as I could, but in the end, it would be an empty life. Instead, I am seeking to challenge myself to live as best as I can and to be the person that God intended for me to be. I know that it’s a goal that I can never attain because I’ll never be perfect. I’ll always be able to improve, but that doesn’t matter. My life of struggling to embrace life and enjoy the gift of life will be enough. And I pray that the love I share with others will continue after I am gone.
My faith saved me. May God’s peace reside in all of our hearts.
