I have been having trouble with my headaches again and I realize when I am in pain, I have trouble sleeping and relaxing because of the pain. I guess it isn’t a problem that is unique to me. The unique part of my problem is that the physical pain response isn’t something that I think about; it just happens. My muscles tense. I just get restless and I don’t even realize why. Then, what’s worse is that sleeping pills don’t work well on me and neither do pain pills. So, even if I give all my pain up to God, I still find myself dealing with it.
I just wish I was better at it but, I to be honest, I’m not. I find myself wanting to distract myself from it and not face it. The bad part of that is that when I run away from pain, then it just gets worse and worse. Then a small problem becomes a huge monster.
Recently, I wrote about how my dog ran away from me even when I just wanted to help her feel better. This situation is just like that, except I am running away from myself. I want to feel better, but it hurts to face the pain I am feeling so I run away. It is amazing how often we run from the very things that just want to help us feel better.
My faith saved me. May God’s peace reside in all of our hearts.
