I saw a TV show this morning where someone had a panic attack. The person’s immediate response was to fight it. They wanted to stop feeling all the anxiety symptoms. It was a reality show, and all the other contestants wanted to make the person feel better and wished they could take the symptoms away as well.
That really got to me because of the way I now feel about my panic attacks. I don’t think they are something to run away from. I am learning that they are something to experience.
I had this discussion with my husband over the weekend about pain. Most people think if they feel pain, then they shouldn’t move. However, the truth is that unless you have broken a bone, have a torn ligament, or have internal damage (organ damage), then if you are experiencing pain, the best thing you can do is move. Movement will help with most pain and the more you don’t move the worse the pain will get. It hurts, but it will hurt even more if you don’t move.
It’s the same way with panic attacks. If you experience the symptoms, it hurts. It hurts a lot. I know I’ve been through it, but the more you try to fight the panic attack, the worse it will feel. When I first started to embrace my panic attacks, it was very difficult, but the more I try to feel them, the better I can handle them. I know that they are slowly getting better, and I have so much more insight into why I have panic attacks. When I tried to fight them, I couldn’t understand why I had panic attacks, and they lasted for hours. It felt like torture. The panic attacks felt like they were going to last forever, and I worried that I wouldn’t be able to live a normal life. If I did, then I was going to be a difficult struggle. And to be honest, it has been a struggle. For years, I had to have pills with me at all times. I didn’t need my migraine rescue meds with me. I could always go home and get them. However, I always had to have my panic attack rescue meds. Now, I don’t even take the panic attack rescue meds.
It isn’t about not taking meds. It isn’t about being strong. It’s about faith. I wouldn’t have had the strength or courage to even try facing the anxiety if it weren’t for my faith in God. I don’t have enough strength or courage to face a panic attack on my own, but with God’s help, I know I can. When I do, now I can grow and learn from them. It isn’t easy, but every time, I feel like it gets a little easier. I thank God for opening up the world to me and helping me to see the world differently.
My faith saved me. May God’s peace reside in all of our hearts.
