I wrote this week that all things I could desire are futile because I would never have enough. I will never have enough money. I will never have enough fame. I will never have enough power. The only way to deal with this problem is to surrender to God and believe that He will provide all that I need.
Today, I realized that there is another desire that I had not even thought of. I desire knowledge and understanding. However, just like the other desires, I will never attain enough knowledge. I feel like the more knowledge and understanding I have, the more I realize I don’t know.
My husband states that the reason all desires cannot be satisfied is that life remains in a state of constant grow and change. The only time life stops growing and changing is when we die. Therefore, we never really can be satisfied with anything from life unless we turn to God and in being His servant want to try to spend our lives constantly growing and changing to become the person that He wants us to be. I will never find peace trying to reach any earthly desire, but I can find peace in just trying to be who God wants me to be because I know that He loves me exactly as I am. That paradox gives me the motivation to continue to try even though I know I will never reach perfection.
My faith saved me. My God’s peace reside in all of our hearts.
