I had a conversation with my cousin the other day. It’s so strange because I was the youngest one of all my cousins and they all think of me as a kid because I was so much younger than all of them. However, now that we are all getting older, the strange part is that I always thought of them as being these adults and now they are seniors in their seventies. I find it difficult to see them as anything but these adults. I couldn’t ever understand why they couldn’t recognize that I am not a kid anymore, but at the same time now I realize I have trouble seeing them as anything but how I saw them when I was a kid.
I realize because of my relationships with them that sometimes it is difficult to break the patterns we’ve had all of our lives. Sometimes we don’t want to change because we don’t see the patterns. Other times, we don’t want to change because it seems too difficult. And sometimes, we don’t want to change because changes is scary. With OCD, change brings on anxiety, but I made a promise to God that I would do anything and everything I could to get better. So, when I find opportunities to change, I might procrastinate a little, but I do try. I struggle, but I try. I don’t let the anxiety keep me from experiencing life.
And they say, the one constant is change.
My faith saved me. May God’s peace reside in all of our hearts.
