I saw a reality show where a man wanted to re-marry his wife for the third time in just fourteen years. He thought he was being romantic and maybe he was, but for me I couldn’t help thinking if you remarry your spouse every few years, then renewing your vows stops being something special.
When I first got married, I never thought I would ever want to renew my vows because I was totally committed to my spouse and didn’t think it was necessary. I still don’t see it as a necessity, but when I look back on my wedding day, I sometimes wish I could do it over again. For a day that was supposed to be all about me, it wasn’t. I found myself planning an event to please all my family and friends so that they could enjoy seeing me taking a vow to share my life with my husband. I can’t help thinking that it should have been a day where I got to feel special as I celebrated my union with my husband, and I didn’t need to care about what anyone else thought. Some day I hope that I do get to renew my vows with my husband. I want to be able to have that special day when I am fully present in the moment and my heart is full of love and gratitude for the miracle of my husband.
That’s the only thing that I regret about my life. I try to have gratitude for every second of my silly little life, but I have to admit there are times that I just go on autopilot. I don’t really appreciate every moment every single second. I know that I’m not perfect and I can’t do it all the time, but I wish I could. Life is just such an amazing gift and I wish that I could have a cattle prod hitting me in the back reminding me to wake up all the time and take in the miracles all around me all the time.
My faith saved me. May God’s peace reside in all of our hearts.
