In less than two weeks will be NaNoWriMo or National Novel Writing Month. The idea is to write 50,000 words in one month. That averages 1,667 words a day. For someone who doesn’t write at all, it may not seem like very much. However, since I do write every day, I can attest that it is a lot especially when the writer is trying to create an entire cohesive story from thirty days of writing 1,667 words a day.
I found out about this project two years ago. I competed in it the past two years. I feel like I made things more difficult for myself because I not only did my 1,667 words a day, but I also did my post each day. I really didn’t mind doing it. Doing my daily posts don’t feel like writing anymore. They feel like I take just a few minutes from my day to reflect on life, focus on God, and pray. If I didn’t do my daily post, I think I would miss it terribly not because I didn’t write, but because I would have missed my time to reflect on God. I truly feel that for the first time in my life, I have found a daily way to bring God into my life and I can’t imagine not having that time every day.
The last two times that I did NaNoWriMo, I ended up with a rough draft, but I haven’t really done much with them. This time my planning time is shortened, but my idea is different. I want to write using my short stories. I hope that I can create something special.
Each November, I fear I won’t be able to reach the goal. The one advantage I have is my OCD. I have this inborn strong will that says if I pledge to write 1,667 words a day, then I will do so if I can. It’s because if I say I am going to do something, then doing it feels better than not doing it.
It makes me wonder about morality, ethics, and a sense of right and wrong. I took a philosophy of law class when I was in college. The professor wanted to prove a point. He had us divide into teams and play a game. My team won. Then, he asked if the prize for winning was $100 and he only gave it to this particular guy on our team, how would we feel. I was okay with it, but I was the only one. Everyone, including the professor, had trouble understanding me. I really couldn’t explain it, but now that I am old I can. I didn’t care about what was right or fair. I didn’t really care about the ethics. I cared about what would make me feel good with my OCD. Letting him keep our prize was the choice that felt the best to me and my OCD.
I often don’t really consider right and wrong as much as I consider what makes me feel good or bad with my OCD. I think it is because when I act as much in my true nature my OCD sense of “wrongness” goes away, but when I act against my true nature that sense of “wrongness’ tortures me. So, I wonder why more people don’t get in tune with their mind, body, and spirit, instead of relying on a set of rules or laws that could never cover every subject or scenario.
By the way, that’s the problem with AI. We can only code AI for all the problems and situations that we can conceive of and imagine, but if it falls outside of our realm of possibility, then AI does not compute. God, on the other hand, knows everything and He created me for every possibility: all that is seen and unseen, all that is sensed and not sensed, all that falls within the realm of possibility and that which goes beyond my wildest imagination. I am ready to follow Him throughout the universe and beyond because He is capable of a perfect creation.
My faith saved me. May God’s peace reside in all of our hearts.
