I am often amazed at how much I love my husband after twenty-three years together. It seems like I find reasons to love him more every day. Something happened today that was very ordinary, but for me it was proof that he is truly a miracle of God. Several months ago, he bought a package of scissors so that he could put scissors all over the house. He had become tired of never being able to find scissors when he needed them and so he wanted to be able to find them when he went to look for them. Today, when he was at work, I needed a pair of scissors, and I went to look for them. All the pairs of scissors that he had bought had somehow magically all found their way to the same place in the kitchen. There were at least five pairs of scissors all in the same place.
Some people might be annoyed by the situation. I had the biggest smile on my face because that was so much like my husband. Our entire marriage, no matter what he does, he always has trouble finding things; it is almost as if the universe is conspiring against him and yet at the same time, I seem to be able to find things in our house even when I don’t know where they are supposed to be. I don’t know how it happens; it just works out that way.
About a month ago, when we were at the emergency room after my husband had his car accident, I felt so bad because as much as I tried to be there for him, I couldn’t keep my body from having anxiety symptoms. I felt so guilty when the doctors and nurses expressed more concern for my having a panic attack than they did for my husband’s condition. However, later on, he told me it was okay, because in our relationship, I’m not the one whose job it is to be calm.
Those things that seem to be flaws or faults in each other aren’t really flaws at all. The more I love and accept him for who he is, the more I love and accept all of him, even the parts that are difficult and challenging. And that’s one of the greatest lessons in love that I could ever imagine. When you truly accept someone for who they really are, then you can love all of them even the parts of them that you don’t like that much.
I have a wonderful little Jack Russell dog. He can be the sweetest dog in the world, but he is a huge asshole. He can be jealous of our other dogs. He can misbehave in some of the most horrible ways. As he has grown older, he has become a grumpy old dog. Most people don’t know the sweet part of him because all they see is a rough grumpy old dog. Yet, I love my grumpy old dog, even when he is a jealous asshole. I think it is because I know him and I accept him as he is. Isn’t that what we all want out of love, for someone to truly know us, to really see us, and to accept us?
My faith saved me. May God’s peace reside in all of our hearts.
