Last night I thought about how life is such a wonderful gift from God, but that lately it hasn’t been great for me. My husband was in a car accident, but thankfully he wasn’t injured badly. Our car was totaled, but insurance helped us pay off the car and we found a good deal on a new one to replace it. My computer at work hasn’t been working for the last week, but we have been able to find a way to work around the problem until my boss finds a more permanent solution. Everything is working out okay, but it feels like I have a black cloud hanging over my head.
It occurred to me that life isn’t supposed to be wonderful all the time and it’s okay. Sometimes there are going to be dark days. However, even during the dark days, I can still see God guiding me in my life. I think God has been trying to teach me to be thankful for all of it. I should be thankful for the good times and the bad. I should have gratitude for my challenges as well as my accomplishments. And when things go wrong, I shouldn’t look for where thing went wrong, but in the blessings that I have been given.
For example, in the car accident, my husband could have been injured far worse than he was. God was truly watching over him that day. When we were in the emergency room, I had a massive panic attack. I didn’t want to leave my husband. I felt awful because the doctors and nurses were more concerned about me than him. However, I felt blessed because for the first time in my life, I knew that no matter what physical symptoms I had, I would be okay. I knew that by fulling embracing who I am and my anxiety that even though my panic attack was uncomfortable, it would pass, and I would be fine. In one of the darkest moments of my life, I felt the presence of God right next to me and I knew that I had nothing to fear even though my body was reacting to a huge amount of adrenaline. I know that sometimes it is very difficult and I am no where near perfect, but the more I know God, the more I want to experience my life and the more I am grateful for it even when it is difficult and painful. God will never let me experience more than I can handle. He will never abandon me.
My faith saved me. May God’s peace reside in all of our hearts.
