My husband took time in the middle of the day to text me something. He said he heard this in a video: Whenever you berate yourself, you belittle the power that created you.
That is a powerful message. I truly believe that even though I am imperfect in many ways, God created me perfectly. He didn’t make any mistakes when He made me. I am exactly what He planned me to be. If I ever put myself down, think I am worthless, or don’t recognize His perfection of work in creating me, then I really am not recognizing how amazing and awesome God is. In fact, I am essentially putting down God’s work as a creator.
My confession is that I have done this very thing in my past. I have sinned against myself and my God because I didn’t recognize the beauty and perfection of His creation. I thought I was worthless, and that people would be happier without me. I feel more embarrassed by this sin than anything else I have ever done. I also feel like I need more forgiveness for this sin than anything else I have ever done. Yes, I have done some awful things in my life, but this total disregard for God’s miracle within me is the worst thing I have ever done.
And I have to take it further, disregarding God’s miracle within anyone not just myself is the worst thing I have ever done. The world He created and my brothers and sisters in Christ are not a mistake. They are all part of God’s plan. I might struggle to understand that plan. I might feel sad and even get angry at God because I don’t understand or like the plan, but I am a sinful woman of pride if I ever believe that I know better than God how He should have created life, the world, myself, or my brothers and sisters in Christ.
Faith is truly a lifelong struggle. It isn’t easy. However, I can’t believe anymore that God would ever make a mistake. Not when He created me. Not when He created anything.
My faith saved me. May God’s peace reside in all of our hearts.
