My idea is that when things aren’t going right with me it is because I’m not going with the flow of life. Today, I had flies buzzing around me, while I had a horrible headache. I am stressed out over so much and I am extremely worried about a colonoscopy in a couple of days. I am not worried about the results. I am just worried about getting through the procedure. When I couldn’t stand the flies buzzing by my face anymore, I got up and tried my best to kill them. As I did, I ended up making a mess. In the whole thing, I ended up falling and hurting myself.
I don’t know what the pain is supposed to tell me. Maybe there are all kinds of possibilities. I feel like a fool for not knowing or understanding. I also know that I am feeling very stressed out. I keep thinking if I could just get to Friday, then everything will be okay, but that doesn’t work. I need to be able to be okay in the present moment. It is just such a struggle to be okay right now. So, the only thing I know to do is try my best to be in this moment with God and pray for Him to help me. I have a feeling I will be doing a lot of that for the next few days.
My faith saved me. May God’s peace reside in all of our hearts.
