When I was young, and I would try to speak my mind, tell my family how I felt, and stand up for myself, I often was ridiculed. My family would tell me that I was being overly sensitive and that how I felt and what I thought didn’t matter. Today, I find it difficult to stand up for myself because I worry that maybe I am too sensitive.
This weekend I find myself in the same situation. I want to stand up for myself, and what I believe is right, but as I do it, I worry that I am being overly sensitive. I think about the idea that I should show love to all my brothers and sisters in Christ and I wonder if I am really doing that.
The person that I don’t want to deal with isn’t seeing me nor are they seeing how they are treating me. I don’t think that person is being malicious, but I do think that their behavior isn’t at the very least helpful and the most hurtful even if it isn’t intentional. When someone acts in a way that hurts me or brings me down, then I don’t need to let them continue doing that. I can’t control their behavior, but I can certainly control my own. If my brother slaps me, then I offer him the other cheek. If he slaps me again, then I’m going to distance myself from him. I can still love him. I can still see the light of God within him, but I don’t need to let him hurt me.
The truth of this lesson is so difficult to understand. It’s not about letting people victimize me or slap me as much as they want. It’s about realizing that I can’t control other people’s behavior and I can’t control how people are going to treat me. However, I can try to love all my brothers and sisters no matter how they treat me. I can treat them how I would want to be treated. I can have forgiveness and understanding in my heart. Yet, I don’t have to let anyone hurt me. I have every right to protect myself and stand up for myself. It’s okay. I think God would want me to love myself enough to take care of myself, too.
My faith saved me. May God’s peace reside in all of our hearts.
